Bummer, Weird, and Delicious

Philip had his wallet and keys stolen today. While I was poking around in the nearby bushes looking for his stuff, I discovered these instead:

Quite the surprise! I am used to finding these in April, in the midwest. This is December in L.A.!! Can't wait to fry 'em up! Yummy! Tomorrow we will go back and look for more!

By the way, if you want to know where I acquired my taste for these babies, behold the professional...

While my grandma likely would have preferred her more glamorous side as her first internet-posted photo, this is my favorite of her. I can still hear her giggle at the sight of a mushroom! I miss her a lot and will giggle to myself as I enjoy every last bite. :)

Sad

In my previous post, I mentioned a young man from the middle school where I work who was gravely ill. His name was Cody. He died on Sunday, the day after his 14th birthday. His family had been posting to this website they had made for him. I didn't know him, but the posts from his classmates, family, the community, and the world attest to how much this kid was loved and to the heartbreak of it all. It is really incomprehensible.

Some of My Favorite Words: "I'm Fine Mom!"

Today I learned that a student at the middle school where I work is critically ill. I don't know the student, but I was [obviously] affected by reading the family's blog and seeing the staff work with students as they process their feelings. This boy seemed to be more or less fine one day, and was then in crisis out-of-the-blue. It is heart-wrenching to think what this family is going through.

As my thoughts went to my own children, I thought about how some days I have to resist the urge to keep them with me, holding them, hugging them, never letting them out in the world, as if that could keep them safe and happy (well it might keep me happy). Last winter around this time, Philip was out of the country on business. I had to drop off Violet early one morning at Winter Camp and picked her up later than usual. It was a much longer day than she had ever spent away. I was really freaked out about her having that long of a day and was driving like a maniac to pick her up. When I got there I was almost in tears. When I told her I was sorry and that I had been worrying about her, she looked up and said, "Mommy, the whole time you were worrying about me, I was having a great time!"

So I am trying to visualize this young man waking up and telling his parents, "Don't worry about me, I'm gonna be fine!"

My Girl

Help with Thanksgiving Cooking

Another Packed L.A. Weekend

Friday night Hollywood premier and after-party? Check. 8 a.m. soccer game with toddler in tow? Check. Baby shower brunch an hour from home? Check. Birthday party for my favorite twin four-year-olds an hour in the other direction? Check. Kid-friendly rock and roll reunion show of one of my favorite bands an hour in another direction? Check. Fun had by all? Check. And this only brings us to Saturday night, people. Keep up! Tomorrow will be a BBQ with friends!

Sucked into the Vortex

Alas I have entered the land of Facebook. Not sure I will return to this slow-paced world of blogging. I think I have developed adult-onset-online ADHD. Oddly enough, I have stopped having my hyper-social urban dreams. So I guess the f/b experiment is successful as an emulation of a social life. But I seem to also be getting out a bit more due to these connections! Hooray!

First Slumber Party

Well, I can't believe I'm admitting this, but I had a *really* hard time getting to sleep last night after I dropped off Violet for her first slumber party. Apparently all went well, although she turned into a raving lunatic upon arriving home and had to take a 3-hour nap (that's normal, right?) But what I want to know is, if I was this nervous for a slumber party 5 minutes away, how am I gonna handle teenager-hood???? Yikes, people!!! I can only continue to believe that karma doesn't behave in the popular sense of karma. That is, I must hold out hope that one's own actions don't literally come back to bite one in the ass in the literal 1:1 correspondence, or I'm in for it. I mean, really, if I am seeming vague here, it's because people might actually read this, and it's not really the forum for that kind of self-incrimination, now is it? At any rate, thankfully, I am getting WAY ahead of myself here. I am just happy that my beautifuls are both snug in their little beds, right where I want them, right where I can sneak in to watch them breathe and pull the covers up around them. Sigh.

I Think I Have to Turn Myself in to CPS

We have been trying to venture out to different neighborhoods each weekend, fantasizing about our escape out of the valley. While dropping in on our friend Justine, Henry managed to crash off of a chair and land face first, all while we were all sitting right there!!! He looks terrible! But he seems to be fine, smiling just as much as ever (i.e., pretty much all the time). Ugh!

The Curiosity of an Almost-6-Year-Old

Violet asks a lot of great questions. Recently, we had to work through the following:
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? She reasoned that the egg had to have come first. When I asked her who laid the egg, well, you get the picture...she grinned at the whole conundrum, but then tidied things up by declaring that it was the egg, and that was that.

Then came, "Mommy, how do you start to get pregnant?" Oh boy. After some honest discussion and carefully couching the "and don't go telling all of your friends this, because diferent families have different ideas about what kids know about these kinds of things," I think I, at some point, pulled a Sarah Palin, "I'll get back to you on that." Aw geez.

That was followed, not five minutes later by, "What was the name of the first month?" such that we had to research the age of the earth, etc.

My brain is tired and it isn't even noon on a Sunday yet.

Eagle Rock Music Fest

Philip and I had a date and went out to the Eagle Rock Music Festival last night. The theme seemed to be "get everybody and their brother (and sister) in the band" á la Arcade Fire. Once I got past my initial Brian Jonestown Massacre prejudices, I realized that I liked pretty much every band that I saw/heard. (See Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros for BJM flashbacks for reasons other than just the large cast.) I particularly enjoyed Abe Vigoda (caught the tail end), Le Switch and Light FM. It didn't hurt that it was a beautiful night with a gorgeous moon, we were out of the stinking valley, seeing friends, and we even found Mirror Pond on tap!

Upon arriving home, the evil nightclub on our block was going at full blast as usual. But I was so exhausted and blissed out I went right to sleep.

Can you say Chihuahua?

Yay! Jeff and Lara treated us all to Jeff's new movie, "Beverly Hills Chihuahua!" (Jeff wrote the story and shares screenplay credit). You know how you go to a kids movie and you just have to squirm at the pain of it? Well, this movie was the complete antithesis of that. It is GREAT! You MUST go see it, kids or no! It was really funny, moved quickly, had great characters, and yes, I am biased, but the story was fantastic (way to go Jeff!!). We had a great time - we even got to see the stars live and in "person," the two cute chihuahuas from the film. I was almost ready to head to the pound to adopt a pooch after this. Do I need to say it again? GO SEE THIS MOVIE!

Glory Hallelujah

Just received a call from our Lead Police Officer letting us know that the club on our block was finally cited last night and will now have to go to court! Hopefully one more step toward shutting these assholes down!

Grown-Up Night

I had a lovely time last night reconnecting with old friends. Sudie has re-arrived in L.A. from New York, and organized dinner with me, Shannon, and Staci. We ended up at Café Stella - which was a bit of a mixed bag (they served Staci a pork loin that was cooked in the fashion of seared tuna - bleeeccccchhhhh!!! and our server wasn't particularly fazed or apologetic. Maybe she could've comped the 1 dessert that we shared??? Or even come back to serve her the new one instead of sending the busser guy and/or check in to see if things were better???? Shheesh!) But that still couldn't affect the warm fuzzy feeling of sitting outside on a beautiful night, holding Shannon's gorgeous baby Franco, talking shop with Staci, catching up, and generally feeling that aaaaaahhhhhhhh, these-are-my-people feeling! This was the perfect respite from my single-mom weekend (Philip is in Nevada campaigning for Obama - did I mention I love my husband?).

Unfortunately, upon returning home, there were cars up and down the street, with people streaming into the menace of a nightclub that now booms horrific music until 4 a.m. on our block. We have to move!!

Stupid Cell Phone Ticket

So, I previously mentioned that I was cited for talking on my cell phone while driving. In case anyone is wondering, that's a $93 ticket. And I wasn't even having a juicy conversation, just missed connections. Bummmmmmmmer! What a waste!

ANYALTR

On my way in to yoga this morning, I saw a Hummer parked in the parking lot with the license plate "ANYALTR." Stunned by the audacity, not only of someone driving a Hummer, but in feeling pride in the triumph of annihilation (of what? I wondered), I haughtily noted that it was parked [explicably] in front of a weight training joint, and yes, symbolically, I rose up the steps to the yoga studio. Coming out from class, two of my yogi classmates jumped in to the thing and drove off. What the *&$%$?

Earlier, during the class, I heard bells ringing from the church next door. I was thinking about how I was choosing to spend my Sunday morning, and how a mom from Violet's school told me that their family wouldn't be at the Back-to-School picnic today because they would be at church (all day?). This spun into ponderings (man, I don't think I was doing a good job focusing on just my breath today!) about atheism, agnosticism, and the ever popular, "Religion is the opiate of the masses." Sigh. I am often apprehensive to raise my atheist feelings, as I feel they are private and can be misinterpreted. One misinterpretation seems to be that atheists don't respect others' beliefs. While I certainly can't muster respect for all beliefs and actions of all religiosity, I absolutely respect others' rights to believe what they believe. The reason I distinguish myself as an atheist rather than an agnostic, is because I feel, in my heart, that there is no God. That doesn't mean I can't agree to disagree with those who do believe in God. I know and have known plenty of amazing people who truly live a life guided by loving and giving principles centered around their faith. And then I know those who choose to live a life centered around hate shrouded in a costume of faith. An archaic definition of atheism is "ungodliness, wickedness," but sometimes I sense that it is still interpreted this way, which leaves me feeling [again] that the world is all upside down, with "Christian" war-mongers running the country [thankfully not for too much longer].

As the Hummer was driving off, I flashed on the thought, "What if I've got it all wrong?" What if "ANYALTR" really meant "Any altar," and that on this Sunday morning, this pair was trying out my place of meditation, the yoga studio?





To further the paradox/confusion, Philip saw this bumper sticker yesterday. Perhaps we should just refrain from distilling politics and religion/spirituality down into bumper stickers or vanity plates, people. Or anything else for that matter. I mean, not too long ago, I saw what appeared to be a Hispanic man driving an old beat up gardener's truck that sported the bumper sticker, "I ♥ Vagina," but hey, I digress...

Eye Level

My favorite thing to do these days is to really get down at Henry's level and play. I try to imagine navigating the world from his perspective, where everything seems so big and interesting. He has now mastered pushing a chair to where he wants to climb up and has subsequently investigated all kinds of things, most of which have not been particularly toddler-appropriate. I like this photo because we were really able to play eye-to-eye and I wasn't having to squat!

Violet's First Day of Soccer

Violet was awesome today on her new soccer team, the Goal Girls! Next week she'll look even more official once she gets a uni. We lucked out and got a great coach, nice parents, and nice girls. She had a blast! All in all a perfect way to spend a Saturday morning. I'm just a little nervous to bring Henry out - I have no idea how I will keep him from chasing after all of those balls!

Scotty and Kathryn's Wedding, Smiles, and a Sigh

We just got back from an amazing time in Portland, where the main event was Scotty and Kathryn's wedding. It was one of those seductively magical times in Portland, weather-wise, friend-wise, and energy-wise that made us feel so joyful, relaxed, and SO MISSING PORTLAND!! (thus the sigh...). The wedding was quite beautiful, at the base of Mt. Tabor, with the reservoir and fountain perfectly serving as a backdrop. Great friends, food, drinks, music, and SQUARE DANCING really made for an unforgettable experience (and King's best man speech really was stellar). Unfortunately, we forgot the camera during the actual wedding, but here are some photos of other moments. Thanks to all of you whom we miss so much for the fantastic time! We can't wait for the chance to get to know Kathryn better and meet the l'il Kloos, who is soon to make his appearance!

The Newlyweds

Colburn Family

Angus, Finn, Violet, Miles, and Lily

Henry

Bella Mia

Bath Buddies Reunited

First Day of First Grade

Violet woke us up at 6:20 a.m. today. She was dressed, shoes on, and her new backpack on! Don't you remember how exciting it was? She even made her own lunch.

#2 Lost Tooth

Here is our girl with two bottom front teeth missing. The tooth fairy seems to roll rich these days and apparently leaves personalized notes.

You Got Chocolate in My Peanut Butter!

Alas, I have neglected to share the good news - I was too busy shouting it from the rooftops. After 17+ years, I found out that I am indeed NOT allergic to nuts or peanuts. As it turns out, it's possible that I never was, but let's not waste time worrying about that - there's lots of catching up to do!!

This week I had the orgasmic experience of rediscovering peanut butter cups. I was holding out on those, sorta saving the best for last as I worked my way through the various nut experiences. Now that I'm a chocolate snob, I opted for the Trader Joe's variety, and omg, they did not disappoint. I have to admit that I have enjoyed almost the entire tub with little help over the course of a week. Can you say "won't be buying those again for a long while??" Sigh. Gone are the days of eating pizza and chocolate eclairs for lunch and then having a WHOLE BAG of Reese's after school (the minis, of course - the chocolate/peanut butter ratio works out better with them). Now I gotta double up on the yoga, but it was worth it!!

More Reasons to Love Los Angeles

Glorious swimming on Saturday afternoon, then went out to Spaceland on Saturday, with kiddies tucked in bed at Grandma and Grandpa's house (thank you!). I hadn't been to Spaceland since oh, about 1999! Saw Amanda Jo Williams singin' and playing her kids' guitar. That girl has some balls. Went from singing "How Much is that Doggy in the Window?" to one that was, ahem, not for the kiddies ("The Sexy Love Song", which can be heard on her myspace page ). Country girl from outer space. Happy to see friends and have late-night tacos with my hubby in Los Feliz taco garden.

More swimming and relaxing on Sunday a.m., then to amazing beach house in Malibu to see east coast family. Lots of cousins! Glorious, joyful beach day! Cartwheels! Low-tide, warm water, sandcastles, cool breeze. Yummy food (heirloom tomatoes! :)), and two tired-out children, driving back home under huge beautiful golden moon. I'm sorry, but I can't help noticing that it has been hovering around 60 degrees in San Francisco these days. My body is happy to be warm and living here!

P.S. Got popped for talking on my cell phone whilst driving. That's nothing particular to L.A., that's just my own stupidity. So embarrassed...

Catch-Up

I skipped a long period in blogging, and, after having jumped back in, I feel the need to fill in some gaps. Between having no computer of my own over the summer and expressly trying to be in the moment with my kids, I didn't pause to reflect and post here. Sooooo....what has gone on? A couple of trips to the Bay Area (once for my dad's 60th Bday and once for Peter's and my 40th Bday (hurrah!)), the birth of Annabelle Olivia King (GORGEOUS!), loads of swimming, some great days at the beach, some fun parties, enjoying our Apple TV, and playing. Philip on the ultimate job search. Yoga. 11-Day Detox Diet (why wasn't I documenting *that* on a daily basis? Wow!). Favorite book of the summer = Barbara Kingsolver's new one. Incredible growing and developing amazing beautiful children. Now looking for every angle I can garner to have a positive attitude re: returning to work, such as:

• lucky to work in school with kids
• lucky to have a job
• lucky to work only 3 days/week
• really enjoy a good deal of the work
• work with a lot of good people

I am trying to resolve the workload issue in a direct and productive manner. I am so bored of hearing myself talk about it, that something's got to give.

Other than that, I am also looking forward to the fact that Henry is now of age where it is much easier to have a babysitter (thanks, Grandma, Grandpa, Chris, and Eric!), so that we can actually get back to going on dates (big smiles, as I do love my husband oh-so-much).

Now time to enjoy every last drop of summer fun. I do feel so grateful and happy in this life.

Ba!

This morning I asked Henry if he wanted to have some breakfast, and he signed "eat" and said "more more" (I guess he associates eating with asking for more). When I went to get him a peach, he proclaimed "na na na na!" (translate: BANANA!!). Just when we were beginning to be afraid that Henry's brain scan might look eerily similar to that of our favorite dog Annie's (hers was rumored to be simply a dirty old tennis ball), he's added to his vocab of "ba" and "ba-ba," which, depending on context, intonation, urgency, and luck may mean "ball," "balloon," "bottle," "book," and ...pretty much everything else.

Sadness, Hope, and Love

Today I received news that a San Francisco friend lost her baby daughter, Tikva Ahava ("Hope Love" in Hebrew). Since I had been out of touch with my friend of late, I had no idea what had been going on, and sat with the heavy weight of it all and cried. Reading through her blog, I am beyond awed by her writings and her experience. The positivity that I struggle to cultivate in my day-to-day life was incredible to see manifested in this context. Her beautiful girl was lucky to have such a fine mommy.

This is one of those times when, for me, it's more challenging to be an atheist. I don't necessarily have a prescribed "go to" place, a framework to easily allow me to reconcile what's going down. It's just my own cobbled-together sense of spirituality and philosophy. I don't pray per se, but I send love, love, love, and good energy to my friend and her family.

And, of course, I gave my own extra kisses before my beautifuls were snuggled in their beds. That's just a no-brainer.

I went on a walk with Violet tonight and I was talking with her about why I felt sad and why I always say that I'm such a lucky mommy. Violet said, "so you're feeling happy and sad at the same time." And that pretty much summed it up. These tears and laughter and joy and pain that we are lucky enough to experience, sometimes in one jumbled-up mess.

My thoughts are with you, Gal, Dave, and Dahlia.

Bath Time

Life has been a bit hectic lately. Thank goodness for a nice, relaxing bath. :) (Henry, 7 mos., Violet 5 yrs.)

New Year's Insta-Fun

Nothing to cure a small existential crisis like a bunch of friends deciding last-minute-style that Encino was the New Year's destination. A little food (Bundt cake!!!), a little booze (ahem!), and news of exciting things to come in the new year (like a new baby for some!), and I was certainly left with a warm, fuzzy feeling. :) Happy New Year!